January 24, 2006

An Interview with Dr. Robert D. Swinkydink

From the BRI (Boring Radio International) studios in Omaha:
An Exclusive Interview with Dr. Robert D. Swinkydink and BRI correspondent Latch Me Zing.
“This whole morphlagus has gotten hazzamed way beyond my verpitude.” These were the opening thoughts of renowned linguist and social visionary Bob Swinkydink as we began our interview in the living room of his home in central Wisconsin. “All I can say is yistudika everyone, yistudika!”
Dr. Swinkydink, a graduate of Ubetcha University, has been on the cutting edge of speech science for more than 30 years. He’s the author of nearly 300 words, a founding member of NASA (Naturally Awesome Speech Authorities) and recipient of the prestigious Norbel Prize in Wordification.
“Tell me Bob, how would…”
“Excuse me, but I’d really prefer that you address me as Dr. Swinkydink.”
“Of course, my apologies. I was wondering Dr. Swinkydink, how would you describe your career as a word author?”
“Well Latchy, at times it’s been extremely verifluous. At first, people were mostly nubleric about my work. But over time, I’ve moggywagged the public’s attention and boomified their hearts. It’s been very rewarding to watch them uberstrate at my feet, figuratively speaking of course.”
“I see. But help me understand this now. What was your ambition? Do you have any advice for aspiring wordificationalists?”
“Sure I’ve some advice for any young adjectivers – stay the phuckle away from my job you little sassuckers! As far as ambition goes, I’m really a pretty self-motivulated guy. It doesn’t take much to get my nuggles blupin if you know what I mean.”
“Let’s talk about your new book. You’ve called it your most ‘Magnicious Occurment’ and yet it’s gotten some pretty harsh reviews. How do you respond to people labeling you as a ‘Serious Nutcase,’ a ‘Babbling Idiot,’ or a ‘Total Moron’?”
“That’s absolutely gibberish! It doesn’t make any sense at all. What do those words even mean? I can’t conceive what they’re trying to say about me. It’s just a condescending method of belittlism to use words that nobody’s ever heard of just to criticize what they obviously aren’t smart enough to understand.”
“Strong words Mr. Swinkydink.”
“Actually, it’s Dr. Swinkydink if you remember.”
“I’m sorry, Dr. Swinkydink. Thank you for your time.”
“It’s been a moof. As I always say ‘Yistudika everyone, yistudika!’”
“We’ve been speaking with Dr. Robert D. Swinkydink, professor of Wordification at Ubetcha University in Wisconsin and assistant speech writer to President George W. Bush in Washington D.C. His new book is called My Words: A Collection of Original Adjectives, Verbs and Shwadishawaks, in stores now. For more information, contact:
Swinkydink Inc.
P.O. Box 666
Ubetcha, WI 91101

January 19, 2006

January Birds

Hello everyone. This is my Birds & Music blog. If you want to read more about me and what I do check out my profile. I'll try to keep you up-to-date on the birds I'm seeing, the music I'm listening to, and whatever else I can think of.
My 2006 Year List is off to a good start. I've seen 55 species so far this month and there's another 10 or so birds that I can still get without too much trouble. Highlights so far are mostly in the finch department, including a pair of White-winged Crossbills, Common Redpoll, Evening Grosbeaks and Pine Siskin. I also saw a Northern Shrike and single Snowy Owl on Peterboro Road, Oneida County; both semi-rare but very cool birds. I've got a good feeling about this year. For one, it's the first full year I'll able to drive around on my own so I'll be able to be out in the field a lot more. And I've already seen a bunch of birds this month that I totally missed last year. So I'm looking forward to it. My goal is 230 and I think I can even pass that if I get lucky. I have a hit list of birds I really want to see this year. Here's my five most wanted:

Lapland Longspur
Carolina Wren
Acadian Flycatcher
Surf Scoter
Sandhill Crane

So that's where I'm at right now. I hope to get Snow Bunting and Horned Lark at some point this weekend, we'll see. I'll post again when I have something more to say. Bye for now,